Online Christian Dating Services - Mistakes to Avoid (Part II)

Here are more of the mistakes that Christians make when they use online dating services. These come from interviews with the heads of leading Christian dating services.

Mike McCartney, a certified life and relationships coach, is founder of SinglesOfFaith.com. He says some of the mistakes Christians make when searching for a partner online are as follows:

- being too trusting too soon;
- making decisions based on their heart, rather than their head;
- making decisions without the input of trusted, wise counselors;
- overspiritualization - "God must be in this, it feels so good;"
- not having the relationship skills necessary to make a relationship (hard, hard work) last forever.

Lee Wilson, founder of Real Christian Singles, comments that mistakes include, " Getting off the website too soon. By that I mean that singles need to use the site to communicate so that they can stay private until they are completely comfortable with the other person. Don't rush things.

"Another mistake I see is that they start paying attention to who they think might be a romantic interest instead of interacting with others on the forum. Real Christian Singles places emphasis on friendships being made on the site in addition to romantic relationships. I think it's important that singles are part of a community of singles like ours. It's an incredible source of support, fun and even accountability.

"We encourage members to be part of the community even if they are dating someone they've met on our site or another way. That's because, as I said before, we're more than just a dating service."

According to Yuri Gorzey, CEO and founder of JCMATCH: "The biggest mistake that some Christian singles make is basing their choices on appearance rather than looking to find someone who embodies the essence of a true Christian. This is not to say that physical attraction is not important because it does play a role; but over the course of time, looks fade.

"We encourage our members to search for someone who lives a life that is in line with the Word of God. 2 Corinthians 6:14-18 clearly states that we should align ourselves with those who share Christian values and who love the Lord. In doing so, God is sure to bless such a relationship because both parties have been obedient to His Word.

"Another mistake is making decisions too soon, from wanting to be married or be part of a couple rather than being single. Christians always need to pray and seek God’s will and direction in their decision making. As the slogan on our site says, we encourage our singles community to 'Let His heart lead yours.'"

* See also Online Christian Dating Services - Mistakes to Avoid (Part I)

May 12th, 2009

* Martin Roth is the author of the Military Orders series of novels, about a church that has established a new military order to fight for today's persecuted Christians.

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Johnny Ravine